Raising the price of sex…

Today I read an article that asked women to collude together in order to raise the intrinsic value of sexual encounters. With the underlying goal being to foster meaningful relationships for women, and to garner from their prospective partners genuine feelings of love and affection…

right...

Now I’m all for women getting something meaningful out of relationships, but this is a pipe dream at best. Martin Luther King’s dream of equality in America was more feasible than this. And people at that time where getting lynched for their beliefs. I don’t see any women out here putting their life on the line, to secure a higher value for sex. But it’s only 6:30Pm here so anything could happen…

And now for the reasons this shit will NEVER work

Reason #1: Men
It’s widely believed that women put far more on the line emotionally than men do when it comes to sex. Men primarily connect on a physical basis and women on an emotional level, because hormones or something…

As a man I can say this largely holds true. There have been tons of times were I was in an emotionally imbalanced relationship. And when I say emotionally imbalanced, I’m referring to a relationship in which one partner is far more invested (emotionally) in the relationship than the other. Like that time in Japan, when my girlfriend of over a year texted me “I love you Keith”, and I skillfully dodged her affection by telling her, “I’ll give Keith your message next time I see him :D

Being caught in an unbalanced relationship is draining. You are pouring your everything into a relationship with someone with only fleeting interest. So what’s a woman to do? Withhold sex! Say it with me ladies. WITHHOLD SEX! Don’t you already feel empowered?

If you are withholding sex to land a man that genuinely loves you good luck! If he says “I love you” is it real or bullshit? How would you even know? How can you possibly determine if an emotion is genuine?? He’s probably just telling you what you want to hear! Now I’m not saying all men are going to gas you up to get in your pants, but a lot probably will. Shit I’ve only told one girl that I loved her, and I only said that so she would leave me alone. Hardly genuine or sincere…

So ladies you might reach your goal of gaining more out of your future relationships by withholding sex and thereby placing a higher value on your intimacy and body, but who knows if you actually achieved anything, because people lie to get what they want.

Reason #2: Women
The video embedded in the original article, claims that at one point women worldwide were in collusion together to keep the value of sex high by keeping the “supply” artificially low… But then it goes on to say, that what actually happened was the advent of birth control. Seriously what notable times in history do you remember women collectively pulling together to achieve something bigger than the individual. Maybe you could cite women’s suffrage but even that was started by a group of men…

Who doesn't enjoy a good duck

There are tons of articles where research has shown time and time again that women sabotage each other all the time. Not just in certain situations or places but all the time everywhere. If you are a woman interviewing for a promising job, your chances of getting that job drop by like 30% if the person interviewing you is another woman! So if another woman won’t even give you a job what makes you think she is going to keep her legs closed in solidarity with you??? Where is the million woman march at to support the cause?

Reason #3: Sex
Come on, we all know that sex feels good, well the large majority of us do… It is extremely hard to resist something that makes you feel good. Don’t believe me just look around at the obesity rate in America. It’s pretty obvious resisting things isn’t our strong point :/

And it’s even more dismal when you realize that a large amount of women never achieve orgasm during sex. And they are still out here fucking! So if they won’t even withhold sex from the lamest of partners…

And not all men are sex crazed individuals. I’m an outlier to that stereotype. I can/and have withheld sex in the past so the playing field isn’t always cut and dry.

As always best of luck!

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Heroin Heaven

Do you think it’s a painful death with someone over doses on heroin?

Do they foam at the mouth, gasping for breath?

Let’s say it’s not an agonizing death. Maybe it’s a scary death where you die panicking from hallucinations. Like the couple that died in Omaha.

Maybe you die because you are so twisted, that you clumsily fall to your own death like Whitney Houston did. Ouch Whitney!

Or do you quietly slip away in euphoria like Philip Seymour Hoffman’s final hours. Maybe a drug overdose is the best way to die! Who wants to get shot in Chicago or strangled in Mississippi when you could die ultra high on drugs! The other peaceful option, death from old age, in and of itself is boring. So if I make it to 99 years of age, one random day the year before my 100th birthday I’m just going to overdose on Heroin and applesauce. I’m going to give that nurse quite a mess to clean up when my bowels full of applesauce are forcefully emptied by rigor mortis. Everyone else will have heartfelt memories of me in the afterlife. But that nurse will remember me a bit darker than everyone else…

And when I lay back in my nursing home bed high off the heroin needles sticking out of both of my arms, I’m going to slip blissfully, through incandescent tunnels of euphoria on my way to Heroin Heaven! And Heroin Jesus is going to open those pearly needle gates for me and direct me to the salad bar, where I’ll bump into the likes of Jimi Hendrix and Billie Holiday!

But…

Maybe Heroin Heaven is Rainbow road from Mario Kart 64.

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Living in NYC

A lot of people have considered moving to New York, and they have reached out to me asking me for advice on living in the big city. New York isn’t some one off city in the world, if you’ve lived in a city before you know what to expect here…

"Another day in the city!"

But at the same time New York takes the normal everyday caveats of city life and twists them up ever so slightly. Take that picture of traffic up there, every large city has traffic, and no matter how early you leave in the morning each day you will eventually get stuck in traffic. But not in New York baby!! We have one of the world’s largest public transit systems. And unlike places like Tokyo the trains run 24/7!! Ahh yes when you move to New York traffic becomes a thing of the past.

Ohh… wait……

There is still traffic on the rails of the subway system!? Whereas other cities have subway systems that run to the minute, New York’s myriad of trains just run on whatever pagan schedule, that appeases the old ones. And this causes traffic on a railway. Something that should almost NEVER happen. Yet it happens so frequently that you’ll consider driving a car for the nostalgia of more traditional traffic. Because nobody wants to be stuck in traffic underground with a bunch of smelly randoms. I mean you can’t even using that idle time to play with your genitals because the homeless guy across from you is already doing it, in fact he has probably been playing with himself the entire time!

And that brings us to the next point of New York city, the people. The people in New York are fucking insane! That homeless guy you saw shitting on a bench in the park, probably wasn’t homeless at all, he’s probably the hipster son of some well to do attorney. And you will see him all the time… because he’s going to be your new roommate!! YAY!!

If you move to New York you will have to get a roommate. And as awesome as your friends are that live here, none of them will be able to live with you unfortunately. They are all in 20 year leases sorry :(

But don’t fret there is a literal ocean of crazed young people out there, with the social skills of hyenas, all eager to live with you!

After 3 months you'll wish you lived with actual hyenas

I’m sure you guys have heard my horror stories with my random roommates my first year in New York. But why live vicariously through me, when you can get your own pack of crazies to live with! And they will be crazy. I’ve hosted a ton of “refugees” in my apartment. People find out their roommate is psychotic and homicidal and come crash on my couch until they can find a “better” living situation. Then the cycle repeats itself , and they are back on my couch after a few months. I don’t know why but crazy people tend to let it all hang out after month 4. So if you manage to live with roommates here and make it past month 4 congratulations, buy a gun!

And that brings us to the last point that people ask me about here, the dating scene. People are fucking crazy! I mean have you seen how dirty your roommate is? Of course you have they are storing their laundry in the oven! Would you date that person?? If you’ve dated in New York you probably have.

One man's girlfriend is another man's crazed roommate

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The rise of the pretty boy!

In recent years people have derided me for being well groomed. Apparently taking meticulous care of one’s appearance is a reason for ridicule… if you are a man.

Half derogatory terms have sprung up to describe men such as myself metrosexual, pretty-boy, nancy boy, fuck boy, lame ass nigga, etc.

In society rugged = manliness.

Pictured: A real man (according to society)

But the scales have tipped recently, as there are a lot more pretty boys walking around than lumberjacks. I mean for fucks sake where the hell would that dreamy lumberjack find work in a bustling metropolitan area like New York City or LA? The only place you will even find tress in most major cities is in the park. And chopping down trees in a public park is a sure fire way to land yourself in jail. And I doubt that rugged beard will keep your dream man from being raped. In fact it might make him more prone to prison rape! Some men like the tickle of a beard on their balls (I’m basing that statement on absolutely nothing). Women you can’t live your life like Sex in the City and dream of dating some rugged mountain man, who may or may not be inbred! Either move to the mountains or get realistic.

Take another look at that picture up there of our archetype man, and take notice of his axe. Real men are great with their hands and know how to utilize a myriad of tools. Ladies if your man can’t change your tire whilst simultaneously chopping down an entire forest with his bare hands, then I’m afraid you are in a lesbian relationship. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news :**(

Let’s overlook the fact that the only reason the stereotypical handyman exists is because, in the past women were viewed as helpless inept damsels in distress…

Every bitch was a basic bitch in the 50s

So here we are in the year 2014, women have made huge strides across the board. Technology has made everyone’s life easier than ever before, and women lament the fact that men today don’t know how to use tools to fix/build things!? Da fuq??

And when a man is useful with tools, and helps a woman out, (again going by societal roles) he usually asks for her affection in return. And for this he is demonized. Simply for playing his societal role, as antiquated as it is. If I changed your tire or built you an entire patio deck, don’t expect me to turn around and ask you for a date, bitch you can expect a bill for my services!!

And lastly real men are expected to be protectors of their meager female companions. I can sort of see this one but…. Have you see that Sharkeisha video??? Women out here are strong as fuck! I’m a grown ass man and I couldn’t even take a punch from Sharkeisha, and she’s a teenager!! Your average american woman is built like a buffalo and is Ford Tough. Shit if anything you women should be protecting me!

And don’t expect me to sweep you off of your feet either. A lot of you women weigh more than me. You aren’t going to have me fucking my back up trying to be romantic…

If women want men to uphold antiquated gender roles then WE as a society should do it wholeheartedly! Women should take care of their rugged man, with his mustard encrusted beard.

Ya'll don't want this to come back...

The only reason I took up the mantle as a well groomed/manicured pretty boy is because the women I’ve dated in the past couldn’t take care of a cactus to save their life. Empowered women today don’t know how to cook, clean, or do any of the things we associated women with in the past. So while I’m waiting on my beer braised roasted lamb to cool off, of course I’m going to exfoliate my skin. I’m not going to sit there and watch that shit cool off. I’m going to get shit done. And I’m going to be pretty when I eat my dinner, bitch!

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The Thirst

I’ve been hanging out with a lot of younger people recently and I have noticed a lot of these younglings are relentless. They are out here each and every night doing any and everything they can to have the chance to mash their genitalia together. At a certain point the effort involved outweighs the potential rewards. And apparently it’s seasonally based…

Winter comes, it gets cold, and people want to be snuggled up with a member of the opposite sex. For warmth… It even has a name, ‘cuffing season’

Then the ice starts to melt, and spring is suddenly in the air. And yet again libidos are rising and the need for companionship is apparent.

Finally the sun is high and summer is in full effect. The warmth brings people out in droves. The beaches are full of scantily clad people, it’s a literal meat market. All the un-clothed bodies raise desires across the board.

Finally the wind is blowing again the leaves are falling, Fall has brought back colder temperatures. Wanting to get a jump on the approaching cold winter people are once again searching for a warm body.

Like I said seasonal…

But the thirst is also age based. I find that two ages groups are the thirstiest. The first group is 15- 23 year olds. You just started having sex in this age group, and you devote a large part of each and every day thinking about it or trying to do it. It’s new to you. It’s exciting! You’ll probably fuck anything given the chance. You will regret a lot of your hook-ups in this age group. If you can even get them. People in this group are flaky as fuck. You have a better chance of curing cancer than meeting up with your peers in this group. Everyone seems to be out partying up until the exact moment you get there. So when you walk into the club/bar and text the object of your desire they just left 5 minutes prior to go to another club/bar, eat pizza, or go home. It starts to happen so much that you start showing up to clubs with pizza, hoping to snare someone who’s about to go out looking for food.

The second group are people 33-48 you’ve had a steady supply of sex in your earlier days, but things have gone sour. Maybe you divorced your spouse. Maybe you lost the flame with your long term girlfriend/boyfriend. Times are once again desperate. You are out here paying prostitutes just to see what pussy looks like. You are injecting silicon any and everywhere. You might have regretted hooks ups you had when you were younger, but now you regret yourself and the things you are going to do/did to yourself.

Time is ticking. Biology is catching up with you. You are literally old news. You are a newspaper from the 1980s, nobody even cares what news stories you have to tell, because who wants to read shit from the 80s? Your prospects are no better than they were when you were in your twenties. Everyone in this group is old and haggard. And who wants to fuck old people? Their knees aren’t what they used to be, they are easily winded, and if things get too vigorous someone might shatter their pelvis. But you are old yourself, so you better put those dentures in and bite your bottom lip and get prepared to fuck some old people.

I’m glad I’m currently in the limbo group. I’m not consumed by the need to have sex, I’m free to pursue other endeavors. And the interesting thing is my lack of enthusiasm somehow presents me with more opportunities.

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Was I even a part of that???

Every once in awhile I get lucky and I get to experience an intimate connection with the fairer gender. It’s regrettable on their part. I mean they could’ve probably hooked up with a crazy successful guy, or an incredibly handsome actor. But instead they some how end up clinging to me like some kind of refugee, in a daze and confused. Given this I think it’s safe for me to assume that many of the women I duped, wooed are imagining they are with someone else. Like that actor they could’ve hooked up with…

Well maybe not this actor...

So out of curiosity I usually ask my lady friends, who it was they were imagining during the course of the night? Because I know it wasn’t me. And I get a wide range of responses from Lil Wayne to George Clooney.

Some women are a little lazier in their fantasy imaginations....

I guess it’s a good thing that during sex I imagine myself. Because if I wasn’t imagining me in the act, I wouldn’t be a part of it at all! That is the sad state of affairs in the bedroom for me. Deplorable.

And this isn’t just some wild speculation here either. As I may have previously mentioned I dated a girl for almost 2 years, and one night, while she was laying across from me she started to wipe my face. Frustrated she looked at me and said “You have something on your face. Is it mud? It won’t come off!”

I thought about what I did that day and at no point did I come into contact with dirt of any kind, we were in Osaka, Japan so there wasn’t much dirt or mud around. So unless her vagina had went mountain climbing or off-roading earlier that day there was zero chance that I had mud on my face. Before I could bring this point u to her she interjected, “Wait! Do you have freckles??”

Umm… seriously?

We had been dating for well over a year at this point. I think you would notice if the person you had been face to face with over a year had freckles or not!?! Unless of course you had been imagining someone else the entire time :(

For a second I chalked it up to cultural ignorance, but I had definitely seen Japanese people with freckles, as rare as it was. Plus she even said the freaking word “freckles”

It's not like I was wearing make-up to hide the fact

What a sham.

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Jadakiss

A couple of days ago I was invited to a private fan party for Jadakiss in Manhattan. I was very confused for several reasons:

1.) I didn’t even know Jadakiss was still a thing
2.) I didn’t know he had enough fans to even host an event like that
3.) How do I even know Jadakiss again!?

I wanted to tell my friend “NO!” when he asked me to go with him. After all I am hardly a fan of Jadakiss. I couldn’t name a Jadakiss song if you had a knife to my throat…

"For the last time I don't know any Jadakiss songs!"

But I hadn’t seen this particular friend in quite awhile, and it was an open bar from 7 to 8. And like any woman knows you can’t say no to free drinks. So I agreed to go. When we finally got to the venue I was shocked to see that there was a line outside. A line might I add that was full of the weirdest people I’d seen in awhile, and I live in Bushwick so that’s saying something. So I assumed a position in the rear of the line with my friend. While I stood there I was a bit uneasy. I was hoping that there wasn’t any visible sign for the event, I didn’t want the multitudes of people walking by to know, that I was standing in line to show my appreciation for Jadakiss. While I stood there a biker whizzed by and promptly got hit by a Taxi. We all looked on at the scene unfold, as the girl laid in the street screaming, and people near her called paramedics. For a brief period of time I was relieved, for now all the attention was down the street away from the Jadakiss line! Still, I slunk back behind some people to hide myself from view.

After standing in line for 20 minutes it became apparent that they were arbitrarily holding up the line to stall out the time for the open bar. I debated leaving right at that moment, and had been there by my lonesome I definitely would have left. Actually if it was just me I never would have went to begin with.

After a few more minutes we finally got in the door. Once inside everyone got patted down by security. Honestly if you are trying to assassinate Jadakiss you need to look at the bigger picture.

Once past security we walked in a bit further where a young girl was giving out raffle tickets. Nothing says street like a raffle… She gave me my ticket and said, “hold on to it, we are going to have a drawing for Jadakiss cds and merchandise later”. As soon as she said that the muscles in my hand went slack, and I dropped my ticket on the ground. The ticket girl noticed bent down to retrieve my ticket and gave it back to me. She wanted to make sure I was in the running to win some sweet Jadakiss items. I thought about if I “won” something how upset I would be. I couldn’t sell anything, that I could possibly win there, and I damn sure couldn’t give that shit away. So I just gave my ticket to my friend, who looked at me like I him herpes.

FINALLY we made it to the bar. There was still 10 minutes left! There was a guy ahead of me. I watched him order a Heineken, the bartender came back put it down and said to him, “That will be $10″


I got the fuck away from the bar and stood near the “VIP” area. It’s doubtful you could be that important of a person, earnestly listening to Jadakiss. The waitress in the VIP area informed me that if I put 2 bottles of Ciroc for $600 I could sit in the VIP section with Jadakiss. I was so taken back by that statement that I just stood there speechless. Here I was with the opportunity to hang out with Jadakiss, and the only thing I could think of is that I don’t even know what Jadakiss looks like! Jadakiss could’ve been standing next to me the entire time I was there and I would have had zero idea.

He looks like any bama you'd see in Brooklyn

After that thought sank deeper into my conscious than I would’ve I evaluated my life up to that point, and decided that it was time to leave.

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“Anyone can do it Jamaal!”

White privilege, it’s something I was innately aware of for awhile but it wasn’t until last year or so that I knew there was a name for this social phenomenon.

Things tend to affect you a bit more when you know without a doubt that something not only exists, but it has a name.

Case in point the itis I had no idea what the itis was and then someone in Atlanta told me about it, that very same day I ate a handful of grapes and out of nowhere I got the itis. Mind over matter and all that jazz.

Like my realization of the itis, when I realized white privilege was a thing, then I started to notice it more often. It went from a rare occurrence to an almost daily spectacle almost over night. Sometimes it’s hilarious, other times absurd, but it’s always ridiculous. Especially when you realize people are oblivious to their own brattiness.

Privilege #1
One of my old roommates asked if he could use something that belonged to me. I looked at him and flatly said “No”. That should’ve been it, there was no need for any further discussion. But that privilege kicked in. He went ballistic, calling me all kinds of names. How dare I not allow him to use something I bought with my own hard earned money. The audacity of me!! I had some kind of nerve saying “no” like that. Where the fuck do I come off telling someone they can’t use my stuff?? WHERE THE FUCK!?!

Privilege #2
I was at a table with a group of people and a young white woman was telling a black woman how easy it is to find time to travel, and that the only thing holding the black woman back from seeing the world was her own fear and insecurity. Not bills. Not family. Not school obligations. Not work. Just her own fear and insecurity. The black girl took that about as well as you expect she would. She looked that white girl dead in her eyes and gave a big fake ass smile, and said “Shit you are totally right. ALL this time I’ve just been holding myself back”.

"Thank you for that revelation"

Privilege #3
A young white woman at a bar spilled half of her Vodka on me. To make matters worse she didn’t even apologize. In fact she didn’t even notice me at all. I was like Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man. The only time she noticed me is when I tapped her on her shoulder, at which point I brought it to her attention that she had just spilled quite a bit of Vodka on my jacket.

You don't spill drinks on my jacket. I do!

This was her chance to redeem herself and not be another drunk ass bitch in the club. But instead she said “Ohh good thing we are both drunk! You are a cutie!!”

Annoyed I replied, “I am not drunk, and you are still spilling your drink on me!” Still not getting it she started to dance up against me, I was starting to get pissed at this point. Then she looked up at me and said, “Mmm you smell good what cologne are you wearing?”

I looked her dead in her eye and said, “Vodka! Vodka that your drunk ass spilled on me!”.

She replied “It smells great!”

FUCK EVERYTHING

Okay that last one might have been more a case of drunken bitch behavior than white privilege.

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Under the radar…

I’m sure we’ve all had that moment. You can’t remember the last time you last felt the tender caress of someone intimately. Perhaps it’s only been a few days, weeks for some, years for others. Regardless of the amount of time, the feeling is the same. So you set about to change your fortune. There are 7 billion on the planet at least 3 of them have to find you attractive right??? With that mindset you don your best threads and set out to find love. Depending on what day it is, what time it is, and where you are you might find a sea of attractive people out mingling or slim pickings. Regardless of the setting you find yourself in you will scoop out the people you could see yourself with. People on the same “level” as you most likely. Or so you think!

You start playing the numbers, and much to your dismay things aren’t going so well. You are getting turned down left and right. People you talk to either have a boyfriend/girlfriend or just flat out refuse your advances.

"Ughh sorry that shirt has a wrinkle in it, this won't work!"

On a normal night you might get discouraged at this point and give up hope. But you’ve been doing that for years maybe. Tonight is the night! You left the house for intimacy and damn it you are going to get busy with someone. As the night goes on the same scenario plays out over and over again. As the rejections mount you start to downgrade yourself, and question your own attractiveness.

"Maybe I'm not a 10 after all..."

With this self devaluation comes a downgrade in standards. And regardless of whether you consciously downgrade yourself or not, if you’ve been drinking this whole time your standards have been slipping with every sip. The longer your search for intimacy drags on the lower your demands are. I’d like to say there is a floor in this type of scenario, a point that is so low that you won’t cross it…

But sometimes you get what you can...

So now someone, whom in any other scenario you wouldn’t pay any heed too is suddenly on your radar. You might have some doubts…

“Really??”

“Maybe I should just go to Taco Bell, and masturbate” (Hopefully not in the drive-thru)

“Should I try again next week?”

But then you remember you came here with one goal and one goal only. So you chug that drink and you go for it. Finally things go your great. I mean how could they not? At this point you are scraping the ground underneath the barrel. This is someone that you not only wouldn’t bring home to mom, this is someone you wouldn’t want to bring anywhere! You try and hurry things along, lest you get jeers from the attractive people who rejected you earlier. Don’t want them to see how low you’ve sunk.

You see some of them looking, in your periphery and perhaps you yell at them in your head, “You drove me to this bastards!!!”

After what seems like an eternity you finally make it back to your house with your new friend. You get the release you seek and you drift into slumber resolute in the fact that someone still finds you attractive, glossing over the fact the feeling isn’t really mutual.

Realization sets in early the next morning, when you see what it is you’ve just done. Maybe times have been really rough and you decide to keep this person around until things get better for you. I’ve made that mistake, Don’t do it!!

*This next part might seem assholish (But it’s real)

I’ve been in the scenario I’ve mentioned previously. It sucks, sometimes it drags on forever. People just settle into what becomes familiar to them. Sometimes it’s accepted usually it’s not. As the situation continues the “friend” starts to get a confidence boost! Suddenly the playing field is leveled. That 1 you found in the dumpster behind Dunkin Donuts now feels they are an 8! I mean they are with you right!? That’s all the validation of their new rank, that they need. So now this charity booty call wants to do stuff. Real stuff! Stuff you’d do with an actual girlfriend or boyfriend. And now shit gets awkward. One day after another “intimate” encounter they flat out ask you “Why don’t you ever take me anywhere?”. Now you have to either come up with an excuse, or come clean.

It’s best not to come up with an excuse, because what ever excuse you have will need to be something that can be applied indefinitely going forward far into the future. So unless you are deathly allergic to everything that isn’t your bed, it’s best to come clean. Who knows maybe you do cave-in and take them out. But when you go out it is super awkward. You are walking so fast that you are practically running, and your “friend” doesn’t understand the rush? They want to walk leisurely through the park, hold hands, laugh, etc. You know, do all the stuff that real couples do. It hasn’t hit them yet, that you two will NEVER work. Now you could keep this up just to feign enough interest, to continue to have a friend with benefits. But you are just kicking that can down the road. And damn is that can ugly.

If you do drag it on, they will eventually want to meet your friends. Maybe even come over for family functions. But remember this is someone you didn’t even want to introduce to your dog… Yea…

So if you are at the point where you’ve dragged this on this far, you are an asshole. You will feel sorry for them of course when you finally break the news to them. But more likely than not you will feel even more pity for yourself for stooping this low for so long. And that makes you even more of an asshole.

But hey it gives people hope!

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Just the tip….

I want to start this off with a question. Do people actually just put the tip in, and then just take it out? Is that something that happens in sexual encounters?

Ladies??

Also while I have your attention ladies, don’t fall for the promises of guys out here. We will call these smooth talking gentlemen “tippers”. They will promise you the world ladies. They will tell you they are going to take you to new sexual heights. They are going to drive your body to the beach and lay with you naked on the sand as you gaze up into the heavens. But in reality half way there the car is going to break down, and they are going to turn to you and ask you to help them push… And if you give them a second chance it will happen again, only this time they are going to ask you for gas money X_X

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